donald trump can bite me (warning: many cuss words to follow)

i wasn't excited when i heard we'd be staying at the trump in vegas.  but the husband needed to be close to the convention center.  and his work is paying for the stay.  so no biggie.  i had mild reservation only because donald trump is a bit of a conservative, obnoxious tool.  but how bad could his "5 star resort hotel" be?

we arrived monday and the tv was broken.  it was fixed and then it broken again, every day, in new and different ways.  it was comical.  and we ended up getting comped for $100 because of it.  the manager was always nice about it, and i never bitched.  i just called down and reported the problem.  i got to know the tv repair guy and joked with him about it each day.

the bed is the worst bed i've ever slept on in any hotel.  the cleaning people left a bag of garbage on our bed one day.  they took our dirty kitchen wears (plates, glasses) and never brought replacements.  the food is HORRIBLE.  but whatever, we're here for dan's work.  

the pool staff people are lovely.  spending 3 days there, i got to know the waitress and then girl handing out towels.  i tipped them quite a bit.  i enjoyed my poolside daybed, swimming, mimosas, etc... 

yesterday was my 3rd and final day at the pool.  a new waitress was working, a bit snotty.  whatever, i'm there to swim and soak up the lovely dry heat.  (thanks arthritis & fibromyalgia i've got a tan!)  i spent all morning there, went to my room for a break and some AC, then headed back for lunch.  a turkey sandwich and red sangria.  yum!

i started lunch and the waitress handed me a bill for $90.  i said, "wow, that's an expensive turkey sandwich!" and laughed, thinking it was some silly mistake.

she explained that it included the cost of the day bed.  i explained that it was supposed to be comped.  she explained that she didn't know and it was the end of her shift, so could i just sign it?  i explained that fuck no (in my head) i would not sign it because it was wrong.  

so the explaining wasn't working and i asked to speak to the manager.  she huffed off.  i put down my sangria and prepared to talk to the manager.  i wanted to be nice about it, because it was just a silly mistake.

here's how the conversation went:

manager: you needed something?

me: oh yeah, there's been a mistake, this daybed rental was comped by the hotel manager.

manager: that was for yesterday

me:  yesterday was when the kid puked in the pool and it had to be shut down.

dick manager:  well we comped you for yesterday, you have to pay for today.

pissed of me:  huh?  that doesn't make sense.  i was at the pool for an hour, had a mimosa and the kid puked.  what am i being comped for???  how do you comp for a comp that was ruined by a sick kid?

asshole manager: you are being comped for the drink and the fruit salad.

livid me: that doesn't make a lick of sense.  really.  i'm done with this.  you can have the daybed back.

smirking manager:  oh, i'll hold the daybed for you, incase you come back.

incredulous me: no thanks.

smirking asshole manager:  i'll hold it for you.

about to explode in a fit of rage me:  there's no way i'm coming back.

fucker mcfuckface manager: i'll hold it for you.

this is when the tears of anger started.  thank god for large sunglasses.

so instead of smashing his smirking face with my iPad, i got up, left my drink, and walked over to a nice family that has just arrived and were desperately looking for shade.  i asked them if they'd like my daybed, as i was done using it.  they were so excited.  i pointed to the manager and said, "if you need anything, just ask him for help." and i walked away.

and as i walked away, i saw his smirk disappear.  and in my head, i laughed and laughed.

and then i got to the room, cooled off, and called the hotel manager to let him know that his pool manager had not only charged me for a comped day bed, but that he made me cry.  the manager was horrified.  he went through our bill and explained that the comped day bed was actually a $50 credit on our bill.  which made sense.  he asked for the managers name and said that he should have taken the time to look at my bill, or at least handled it better.

he offered to move up to some fancy penthouse suite for the night, but i declined.  i said, "i'm not here to get things comped.  i know some people are obsessed with that.  i just want to pay for things and have them work and i want things to be fair.  i don't want to be treated with disrespect.  i'm 42 years old and in that time i've never sent a meal back or filed a complaint.  i'm not picky or fussy.  i just want things to be fair and ok.  thanks for the upgrade off, but we leave tomorrow, so no point in moving."

today our actual vacation begins.  dan's done working.  we move to a nice little hotel (vdara) on the strip.  tons of suff in walking distance, like the bellagio & the cosmopolitan.  i can't wait to check out the new hotel and the pool, of course.

after dan gets some rest, we're going to have a blast.  we want to go to freemont street at night.  i'm going to zipline there!  we're going to try and find the in & out burger near UNLV campus and a dive bar that doug stanhope once recommended to me (the double down.)  we might take a tour bus to a nation park.

oh, here's a funny letter that "the trump" sent to an online style writer, who mentioned his toupe in an article.  (maybe he'll send me a letter!)

post script:

some more fun with trump!

here's the store where you can buy a pack of gum for $4!  or you can go to pay, hear the price and say "no thanks" (fuck that noise!) and walk out.

trump merch, including his own cologne for men.  if it's anything like the perfumed scent in the lobby, i'm guessing it's called "failure".

there's me!

the croque madam breakfast with Mornay sauce was excellent.

hey wait, there's no grilled tomato on my damned sandwich!  i asked the waitress about it and she said the menu was wrong and needed corrected.

oh donald... even your menus are full of fail.

love,
xxxooo
bittergirl 

some things...

this is a pic ginny snapped yesterday.  she's been a great doggie aunt!  she's sending pics and a video of gilly snoring in bed next to her, head on the pillow like a little human.  charlie is now totally comfortable with her and she's getting to rub his belly.  

this may seem small, but it's huge for me.  being on vacation and not worrying about dogs, it's a gift.  our vacations in the past were filled with worry over sick elderly dogs.  so being able to spend 7 days away without worry, that's a big deal.

i'm so grateful for ginny taking the time to send us little updates.  i'm incredibly grateful to have young, healthy & happy dogs.

i can go spend my day by the pool totally relaxed.  well, i might be concerned about kids getting sick in the pool, but otherwise it's RELAXATION TIME.

i picked this slot machine to try my hand at gambling.  i picked it because it's the name of dan's favorite beer, and monkeys are cool.  i spent around $25 dollar and of course didn't win any money.  i did win small amounts on spins, so i sat there for quite a while.  it was fun to play and people watch.  but slots are boring and gambling is dumb.  

thank god, i've found something bad that i'm not addicted to!

i had a lovely bloody mary in the hotel lobby, along with crab cakes for lunch.  and great people watching.  vegas is so damn weird.

i snapped this pic because it's the first time i've worn anything sleeveless in years.  it makes me want to keep losing weight and get more tattoo work on my arm.  

this is something i never thought i'd say:  i cannot wait to get home to start back exercising!  more swimming, more spinning, and a weight class on sundays.  huzzah!!!!

speaking of that, time to hit the pool.  at least i'm getting some exercise in vegas.

today was not at all like yesterday!

so i started the day at 5am, catching up on emails.  ordered room service for the husband and i.  called the front desk to report the tv being broken AGAIN, for the 3rd time in 3 days.

talked to a manager who offered to move us to a fancier room.  i said no thanks.  she asked if there was anything else she could do.  i asked if she could comp my daybed at the pool.  (a whooping $50 fee.)  she was happy to do so and i was happy to have gotten my first ever comp.

my morning view

i got to the pool when it opened at 8am.  tipped the girl who took care of me the day before (missed her yesterday when i left.)  i drew a sketch on my iPad, read a chapter of the jenny lawson's memoir, then got into the pool and swam about 10 laps.

my sketch of me reading a book (on my iPad) from the cabana

there were a few kids in the pool.  a little dutch boy who was learning to dive and very cute.  a funny little japanese kid who said he liked the flowers on my arm and told me he was learning to swim from his dad.  cute kid.

the view from floating on my back in the pool

my fingers were turning into prunes so i got out.  sat in the sun for a few minutes.  got back in my little daybed and the waitress brought me my first mimosa.  i thought, "this is just awesome!"

sketch with color!

at that moment, i noticed my favorite lifeguard girl choking, and her clothes were wet.  i thought, "this doesn't seem good!"  i saw my little japanese friend and his dad walk back, and the kid was crying.  the lifeguard spoke to them and he said the kid was ok.  so i went back to my mimosa and another chapter of my book.

warning:  anyone suffering from emetophobia, STOP READING NOW!

the waitress came out with the big bowl-o-fruit and then the (wet) lifeguard came over.  she said, "um... yeah... the pool is going to be closed for 4 hours while we shock it... that kid just threw up in the pool."

so i tipped the waitress (who brought me a 2nd mimosa) and the pool manager said i could come back tomorrow morning for another free day in a cabana.  so i got my fruit bowl to go and made my pilgrimage to the circus circus casino.  click here to see the kabillion pics i took.

it's a weird old casino.  not in the best shape.  it wreaks of cigarette smoke & failure.  i play $5 of carol's money on a slot machine with cats on it.  then $20 of our money on a machine called "golden monkey" (dan's favorite beer!)  i won a little bit (maybe $10) and played until i lost it all.

then i walked around, took a ton of pics.  i made my way up to the "adventure- dome" and got to see a weird trapeze show.

i want a zoltan for our house

i was taking a pic of this zoltan machine and a maintenance guy started moving it to a new spot.  i turned around to take more pics and here's the conversation that ensued:

maintenance dude:  you sure do take a lot of photos!

me:  yeah, i'm totally afraid of clowns!

confused maintenance dude:  well... i guess you came to the right place...

me:  yeah...

today is going to be a lot like yesterday...

i was going to go run around some casinos or something, but i think i'm going to sit by the pool and read, swim, have a mimosa, etc... i just love being out there in the 103 temps.  which is bizarre.  but i stay shaded (unless swimming) and apply tons of sunscreen (not going to screw up my tattoo.)  

i'm readin jenny lawson's book and LOVE it.  if you read one thing by her, read this post on her blog.  she might be my patron saint/long lost sister.  she's not only hilarious (and a cuss mouth), she also deals with anxiety, depression, and a chronic pain condition.  hello???  i am so much relating.  and reading her memoir, i'm laughing and snorting and laughing more.

the husband & i went to dinner with his bosslady and had a good time.  we went to holstein's at the cosmo and of course i didn't get the burger or milkshake that they are famous for.  i did get a blood orange cosmopolitan & crispy pork on steamed buns.  delicious!

yesterday's pics:

poolside fruit bow with super fresh ice cold fruit & basil.  so good. 

how a nerd hangs out by the pool: mimosa, MCA, moleskine journal and lots of sunscreen. 

 i'm obsessed with the glittery lights & beads in the lobby of the hotel.

we will not be going to this idiot's show.

poolside cabana & beautiful view...

things i drew on the plane...

first day in vegas, some random out of order pics...

the tv was broke in the hotel room and you can see that i might have panicked. 

it was a beautiful sunrise outside of denny's at 5am. 

they sell crocs at the cleveland airport! 

weird to find myself somewhere with palm trees. 

hotels in vegas are sparkly. 

i spent about 30 minutes at the pool is the crazy sun and already have tan lines.   (the pool actually sucks.  it's super tiny and there's no deep end.  so one day i'm going to some crazy adults only pool at mandalay bay.  i will be keeping my top on, fyi.)

i like sparkles. 

sparkles.

so yeah, i'm exhausted.  i've been up since 2am cleveland time.  it's now only 4pm in vegas.  i'm so confused.  but i like sparkles!

here we go...

up super early, doing last minute packing & worrying. spending time with the dogs. worrying about the dogs. can't believe we'll be gone for 7 days!

2 of the pastiest, travel anxiety, homebody hermits are heading to a place that reaches temps of 110 degrees.

per wikipedia, the hotel where we're staying has a "reflective surface and concave design can act as a parabolic reflector to create a phenomenon in which the reflected rays of the sun can create dangerously hot conditions at particular points on the pool deck. Employees have called the phenomenon the Vdara death ray." i'm going to get a nuclear tan!

neither of us gambles. but while dan is at his nerd convention, i'm going to head over to the circus circus casino to take black jack lessons. it's a pretty run down casino, but i have to go pay my respects to the casino that hunter s. thompson wrote about in "fear and loathing in las vegas."

i'm going to try and have fun, explore the weird side of vegas. try new things. take tons of pics. yes, fun will be had!

here's a song that i love from a movie i love. here we go...

oh the places we'll go and the bloggings we'll blog!

well, in 2 days we jet off to las vegas, for work & fun.  i'm going to update the blog every day, because i'm a nerd.  

so, time to get ready for anxiety travel & 100 degree temps.  at least the drinks are cheap in vegas!

more vegas huckabuck....

i've been writing down random notes and thoughts while here in vegas. i have an hour before dinner so i'll type it all up fast and stream of conscious-like!

las vegas smells like burgers. the air, no matter where we were outdoors, smells like a frying hamburger. i find that odd....

also odd: we had to walk a block to the courthouse for our marriage license, and on the way we had a couple smarmy looking guys in cheap suits offer to "help us" find the courthouse and then offer religous pamphlet with offers of marriage services. we stuck with our favorite, "no thanks!" response and quickly walked on.

last night we took the monorail to the strip and saw the paris casino and spent a lot of time at bellagio. one of the few things i was looking forward to in vegas was seeing the bellagio fountains at night, and the chihuly blown glass flower ceiling inside. i LOVED the weird indoor exhibit at bellagio, especially the weird baby eagles (see video below.) the chihuly ceiling was amazing and we were able to be right in front of the hotel for the fountain show choreographed to "viva las vegas". i loved it! it was like fireworks made of water.

in our hotel (the hilton), besides barry manilow, we have the star trek exhibit, which i've had to cut through to get to other places. once a nice ferengai seemed to flirt with me, and on another occasion a crabby klingon bumped into me and didn't say "excuse me". not sure if he was in character or a jerk. (fyi- the only reason i know anything about star trek is from being roomates with lisa ann. she used to force me to watch it.)

i hate flying, but i love room service. las vegas restaurants are all so loud! room service is great because you can have a fancy dinner in PJs! we went to the italian place here in the hilton and i had a really good osso bucco. it's something not found on most italian menus, and the waiters are always impressed when you order it! (and no lectures about veal. it's not any better eating an "adult" animal! someday i am totally going to be a vegetarian....)

tonight we're going to see penn & teller, i'm so excited!!!! then tomorrow home, finally. i wonder if the dogs will be excited that we got married?

ok, time to order room service. ciao!

we got hitched!!!!!!!!!!!

on 6/17/08 i became a married lady. go to my photo blog for pics of all the hub-bub. i wore the black beaded dress from smitty's wedding & dan wore his fancy dress clothes and tie. we wanted to get married in private. isn't that funny? we're just both sort of shy in our ways and wanted to say our vows without a crowd. but we still want to throw a "belated" reception in november!

i was able to book the entire wedding via email with a nice lady in the hilton wedding chapel. not one phone call needed, which made me so happy.

we arrived monday evening in vegas. the courthouse downtown closed at 8pm so once we unpacked and had dinner, we got in a taxi and raced to the "old strip" near freemont. it was easy getting the license and took about 15 minutes. we giggled the whole time.

the next day dan had to work, so i meet with the wedding planner in the chapel. she was the nicest lady and was our wedding planner, witness, photographer, and videographer. (she’s been working in vegas wedding chapels for almost 20 years and loves her job.) she helped us plan the small ceremony, pick music, flowers and decide on what kind of ceremony we'd have.

she gave us a bottle of champagne and we made mimosas before we went down to the chapel. it was tuesday, june 17^th at 6pm. (06/17/o8, per wiki is also barry manilow's birthday, LOL!)

the minister walked into the chapel sucking on a lollipop. he was an older guy in a nice suit, and he was really sweet and funny. he talked a lot and gave us advice on RVs and talked about the beauty of the desert.

we played tom waits' "a little rain" for the walk up the aisle. i think it took me all of 5 seconds, it was such a small chapel and i was nervous. the minister loved the song and quietly asked the planner to let it play out, because it was a beautiful song. he did a non-religious service and what he said made me cry, it was so lovely. i cried and giggled like a loon. after our vows, we walked down the aisle to "long way home", another waits song done by norah jones. the minister loved the music so we gave him our "wedding mix CD." (that meant a lot to us.)

we laughed and talked with the planner and minister, and took photos. then we hopped in a taxi & went to the stratosphere for dinner. we called family & friends on the blackberry to tell them the good news, until we realized folks back home in ohio were already in bed!

dinner was amazing up in the spinning restaurant, although when we got there the sun was so bright in our faces. the waiters tried to stand to block the sun when we ordered. we had drinks and steaks and just talked and laughed. the view was magical and there was a big pink moon over the mountains and it reminded me of that nick drake song from the VW ads.

ya know, i like to think of that old minister driving in his RV, out in the desert, listening to tom waits, & sucking on a lollipop....

so it was wonderful and lovely and we're really happy. enough "mushy" for now.

links to hear the songs:
a little rain link
long way home link
pink moon link

heat and boredom in las vegas

(i went through my photos and noticed this 2nd pic i snapped on the shuttle to the hotel. something seems a little weird....)

i am bored in vegas. in the hotel in my PJs, eating beef jerky and goofing around on the computer. it's 105 degrees outside, and groundcat's in his AV geek seminar all day. i went downstairs and walked around, took pics and had coffee, then downloaded new ringtones. my current ringtone is the theme to "the office".

some stuff i've been meaning to blog about:

1. do not watch the movie "fearless" before flying on a plane. don't watch it if you ever plan to get on a plane ever again in your life.

2. finally saw "shaun of the dead" and loved it. so funny and well done. i even cried a little. the first zombie movie i've liked!

3. on the plane, we didn't buy headphones since it was a bad chick flick (something with ryan reynolds.) after the movie they played episodes of "everybody loves raymond". i never liked that show and now i know why. it's just people fighting, being crabby and arguing a lot. same thing with "king of queens". married people being bitchy to each other. people yelling at each other a lot. no thanks!

ok, i need to get out of this hotel and do something. we're going to see the fountains at bellagio tonight, then penn & teller tomorrow. ciao!

the ugliest carpet in the world......

las vegas is home to some of the ugliest carpets i have ever laid my eyes on. i think they try to distract people in the casinos with ugly carpet, mirrors and bright lights. the carpet is so grotesque, you won't notice you've gambled your life savings away!

us looking "old school vegas" thanks to photoshop.