August 29, 2005

Jcglitter2: did you like my blog????
Jcglitter2: you're famous!
kablooie ranks: haha
kablooie ranks: I was a bit disappointed
Jcglitter2: what?????????
kablooie ranks: it took so long, I expected to read all about how evil I am
Jcglitter2: i know, that was part of the joke.
kablooie ranks: and about how I got under your skin
Jcglitter2: duh!
kablooie ranks: /me fumes
Jcglitter2: god, you're so pedestrian!
kablooie ranks: stop that
kablooie ranks: unbelievable
Jcglitter2: hahahaha!
kablooie ranks: your evilness is subtler than I would have guessed
Jcglitter2: that's the best thing anyone's ever said to me!!!!
Jcglitter2: go post that as a comment on my blog and then i will forgive you!!!!!!!!!!!!!
kablooie ranks: no
kablooie ranks: hahahaha
Jcglitter2: it's ok, i'll cut and paste this IM right onto my blog.

the person wearing these socks (whose name rhymes with todd moody) is dead to me for the rest of the day. don't ask why!

August 28, 2005

i've had some major revelations recently, and thought i'd ramble on a bit....

first of all, i realized this weekend that i will never drink again. you see, i've noticed recently that alcohol really never makes anything better, and almost always makes things worse. since i stopped drinking, i always thought i could try again and be moderate, a "normal drinker". maybe i could.... but i will never try it. life feels too good now.

the next revelation is that i am a hermit. it's my nature to enjoy being alone for the most part. i have friends and family that i love and spend time with, but hanging out at home with the cats and dogs, my books and crayons, is what i enjoy mostly. and that's ok!!!

the third revelation involves a goiter. i saw a guy downtown who looked as though he swallowed a football, and it occured to me that, "hey, my life could be worse! at least i don't have a goiter!!!" now that's deep. :o)

and finally, i realize that i fucking hate robots! they scare the bejezus out of me.

August 27, 2005

sigh................... some of my friends are going through rough times. i just want to protect them all from the hurt they are going through! to all of you going through bad stuff, just let me know what i can do to help. that's all....

August 24, 2005

one of my good friends is in love. you can read about it on his blog (but you'll have to figure out which one) below. i am so amazed at his "balls to the wall" approach! he's just putting himself out there and taking the big risks, and it's impressive. i don't know if he'll get the girl (although he should dammit!) but if it doesn't happen, at least he can say he tried his best and didn't chicken out. hell yeah!!!!!!!!!

as for me, i now love my new job and feel totally good about things. i have caught up and am once again the smartest kid in the room, as it should be. my boss and i have an agreement that at least once a day he will make sure to say something funny and wildly inappropriate to me, to counteract my spending all day in "the pit" with the shy and polite people.

ok, my current celebrity crushes are: hugh laurie, dave grohl, john hockenberry, john cusack, and as always; vince vaughn and david letterman.

ok, ciao!!!

August 20, 2005

this is the lobby i walk into every morning. it's amazing and the picture doesn't do it justice. but every morning i am stunned by my good fortune to be back downtown in such a beautiful building. then i get to my desk and panic. this new gig is really difficult! and while i know i can do it, i'm not used to having to really "try". i am used to being the smartest kid in the room! now i am overwhelmed...... so this weekend i am going to play catch up and work from home. i work in a room called "the pit". no lights on and very chilly. i love it! but everyone is new like me, and so quiet. operation "pretend to be normal" failed by day 2. i am now known as the funny girl who loves animals and is clumsy. i broke off a chunk of my desk the other day. everyone just quietly giggled at their desks. oh well, at least i have fun! and my boss is hilarious! he's so sarcastic and funny. the other day he passed me in the hall and yelled, "get back in your cage!" when i made a little crack at him he told me to "go rescue a dog!" ah.... at least there's one funny mean boy to play with! if you want to know about the project i am on, this is a start. i am part of a team of almost a 100 people working on this project. some in NJ, GA and india! it's going to go out to 140 countries in about 2 years. the project is a huge application that auditors will use to audit companies like coke, mcdonald's, and viacom. it's gigantic!!!

August 17, 2005

you know it's bad when there's no picture! was a disaster. i missed 1 dose of my anti-depressant and got incredibly sick. it started by mid-morning. i was light-headed and naseous. then really dizzy and sweating. by the time i got home i had stomach pain and shaking hands. apparently effexor is the worst offender as far as bad withdrawl symptoms that happen very fast. so while i was getting more and more sick today, i got called into meetings at work and had work assigned to me! it's day 3 and now i am expected to write a gigantic test script. i know i can do it, but i got so lazy at the last job. 4 months with super easy testing and no real test scripts to write. so i need to just "buck up!" start hauling ass and taking names! and definetly need to never miss a dose of effexor......

August 15, 2005

SBC for life!

mom likes her new job, but misses her friends (even my dad who is mean an picky! dog saliva is not bad for you!) anyways, she said maybe i can come downtown for some new adventures....

hank's the last of the pack to be blogged. his full name is "mother fucking hank" because he's a bad seed. he's always underfoot and he just has a bad attitude, but i love him.

first day at e & y was good. i got a fancy new laptop and am sitting in an area called "the pit". it's cold and dark, so i love it. it's a room with about 10 of us testing the same application. i like my new boss, he's funny and sarcastic. and i love being downtown. but i am exhausted as hell, so am going to make a chicken cassarole and go lay around for the rest of the evening.


August 13, 2005

goodbye MIS...... definitely the strangest place i've ever worked, which made me feel right at home! i will miss seeing everyone (see quote of the week) but plan on staying friends with folks. SBC for life! todd, carlo & jon might come over tomorrow. i'll stay in touch with my former boss tim, but only out of spite (he doesn't like people.) amy w. just kicks ass!!! she's a bossy gal just like me and i am going to help her start a blog soon. old man dennis has invited me over to meet the wife and reminisce about the good old days on mapledale drive. jeff can just go to hell.

the thing i'll miss most about MIS are the odd signs. signs on how to flush the toliet. or the "i am hand soap" sign on the hand soap dispenser..... i'll include 2 of my recent favs....

ok, i am exhausted. time to read a book about depression or super sweet ninjas.

August 11, 2005

who would ever have thought this shy little girl would grow up to be such a .......freak. go to mike's journal and put your nickname in. i did glittergirl.

"based on the live journal interests lists of those who share your more unusual interests, you might be interested in:"

1. miso soup
2. hobbit sex
3. strange sex
4. tortured souls
5. rust
6. proving myself
7. operas
8. facts
9. being a virgin
10. mc donald's
11. balenciaga
12. teeny little super guy
13. chips and salsa
14. missoni
15. sorcerous stabber orphans
16. pierce brosnan
17. social psychology
18. echos
19. giving presents
20. camoflauge

i'm scared.......

August 10, 2005

a time to reflect.....

well, the cone is off and i am taking some time to reflect on my life. the time i spent in the drawer, then my escape and subsequent adventures. dad is repulsed by the licking incident and doesn't want me back. it's sad, because you're not supposed to blame the victim... but aunt jen says i can stay with her. she's real busy, so everyone complaining about this bog not being updated needs to shut the hell up! ciao people......

this website is hilarious.

Scene 1:
Ninjas walk down street to go eat some food. Ninjas are all wearing black and looking totally sweet. There is some awesome music playing in the background to get the audience really pumped. Then some dude jumps out of nowhere. The ninjas start beating this guy's ass bad. Then the dude starts trying to run away, but one ninja pulls out a ninja star (ninja weapon) and throws it at the dude. The ninja star cuts the guy's head totally off. The head rolls over near this old dog that looks at the head and barfs all over the place, including the camera, which is awesome. The ninjas start flying and everybody starts screaming. Then the scene ends.
Scene 2:
A ninja is sleeping at his house. Some idiot walks by singing a super annoying song. Then the ninja wakes up super pissed and ready to rock. The guy just keeps walking and singing, while the ninja starts cutting down a building. When the guy walks by the building, it falls on him. (When the building is falling, a guitar will be wailing hard in the background.) There will be a close up of the dude's feet sticking out from under the building. The feet explode all over the place, because of blood pressure. Then we see that the ninja was playing the guitar. Then all these babes start coming out of nowhere and the ninja starts wailing ever harder (if that's even possible). Then the camera starts fading out and then explodes.


-I thought of this script right before bedtime. I got so pumped I almost kicked my mom right in the face!

August 9, 2005

pretty soon i really will be glittergirl in the city. i am so excited to work downtown. most people hate it, but i really love being in the city. i can walk to a bank, post office, drug store or restaurant. i get to ride the bus and people watch. i ride the flyer and get downtown in 15 minutes flat. and there are so many freaks to observe....

good news, the new job, although a consultant, offers great benefits. medical insurance is only $20 a week, as opposed to $380 a month if i used cobra here. very cool.....

ok, i am keeping it short and sweet. i'll need to work on gorilla monkey pen's blog tonight. i think he's getting the cone off today!

August 8, 2005

i've been awful busy helping out gorilla monkey pen with his blog. it's like some terrible combo of curious george meets fear & loathing in las vegas. quite sordid....

the above pic is my oldest friend sladjana with her daughter samantha. i've known sladj the longest of all my friends, since 7th grade, science class i believe. and of course band. her name is serbian and it means "sledgehammer" in english. hahahaha, inside joke, just kidding! she's a doctor (so is her husband jeff) and they just moved back to the area after years in NJ and boston. she's one of my best friends AND she likes my blog. so right now she's at the top of my list. lucky her!!!

looking for love in all the wrong places....

i was feeling lonely since i broke up with the pen in vegas. i thought maybe i'd hit on one of the many cats in this place..........

the gray one was into me big time, but i wanted to hook up with the black chick.

she was obviously not interested.

next thing i know someone is smearing peanut butter on my face and all i see is this tongue coming at me!

this is the last thing i remember seeing.

next thing you know, i wake up in bed with this cone on my head and major head trauma from the licking injury.

dad....i think i wanna come home soon!

August 7, 2005

this is my new friend gorilla monkey pen. he's a nice chap i met at work the other day. he's asked me to help him with his blog, so here's the link:


hi, i'm gorilla monkey pen. i snuck out of a desk drawer and am looking forward to having fun!

this is my dad. he doesn't like it when i touch his ear.

i went to vegas and married a nice pen...

but we got into a fight and i split town.

more later!

another day, another monkey photo.....

i don't care what that rotten old cathy says, monkey pictures are always funny! anyways, i spent the weekend shopping for clothes for the famcy new job. i am extremely broke, so i started at the thrift store and then hit the bargain racks at the mall. i got some good stuff, but it's hard to find clothes for chubby girls who are also petite (i.e. short.) plus i have to cover numerous tattoos. i am a hot mess! anyways, here i am..working my last sunday rollout. boss is taking us to winking lizard. then i am off to selena's party and more shopping. then home to collapse on the couch.

sladjy-pie, shoot me an email. i can't seem to find your email address. mine is send me some good pics of you and that kid and i'll toss you up here too. i'll tell the story of the brass bottle opener shaped like a penis! ah....good times.....

August 5, 2005

ah, good old charles bukowski.... professional drunk as well as gifted poet and writer.

"he sat naked and drunk in a room of summer night, running the blade of the knife under his fingernails, smiling, thinking of all the letters he had received telling him that the way he lived and wrote about that-- it had kept them going when all seemed truly hopeless...."

anyways, i fell off the wagon last night. i had a bottle of carlo's chianti i was saving for god knows what. i was just so exhausted, but wound up, and depressed about my checking account. of course it only made me feel worse and when i woke up, i felt like crap.

the difference now is that i won't let 1 slip send me back on some bender. it was just a mistake and i will learn my lesson and move on. feels like progress.....

i've let everyone at work know that for my last week here i plan to "rock out with my cock out!!!" hells yeah......

August 4, 2005

this is matilda, otherwise known as "the gray cat." she's the most quiet and non-pushy of the cats, except in the bathroom. she loves to sit on the sink and play with water. she's very sweet and not at all like her sister opal (who i will feature another time.)

big news. i got the job at ernst & young. i start on 8/15 and i am so excited to be back downtown and at a new fancy job. but i will miss my friends at the current job. well, most of them. i actually cried when i told my boss i was leaving! such a girl....

in other news, griffin's stitches are out finally. he did wonderful at the vet and we didn't even have to sedate him. just let him stay on the floor instead of the table, and i petted and talked to him while dr. bedi took out about 60 stitches.

August 3, 2005

sad news....... lisa's nephew jacob (who i have known since he was born) is over in iraq and it's his battalion based out of brookpark that's been hit. first 6 men were lost on monday, and now another 14. lisa tells me he's lost 2 good friends now. hopefully he will be home in october.

i've known him since he was born, and saw him as a mischevious toddler. when i moved back from columbus he was a typical teen. but 2 summers ago i saw him in his army fatigues at a family cookout and almost didn't realize it was jake. he had become a man. he was walking so straight and shoulders back, i could tell he was in the military. i got to see him hug and kiss his grandmother (marilyn) before she passed away later that summer. and all i could think was, "he really turned out to be a good and strong man." now, i don't believe in god or prayer, but if any of you do, say a prayer for jake and the families of all the men and women over in iraq and for the familes of the 20 that have been lost these last few days...

in war, there are no unwounded soldiers..... jose narosky
the culprit.......
this is mike, my sister's fiance and the guilty party in the case of the barking dog. they've been together for years, and he is a part of our family. he is also crazy. he's so funny and full of energy with a million different ideas. he's an artist and does amazing drawings. he's terrible at doing laundry but great with animals. and my all time favorite thing is to watch him in my mom's pool. he turns into a little kid! he puts on googles and swims underwater like a shark. the best is when he gets into the big intertube and starts splashing his arms and legs so fast. makes me laugh every time. and next month he will be my brother inlaw. weird... but very cool. you can't see it in the pic, but this was taken on mother's day. he's wearing a charlie manson tshirt and wrote "happy mother's day!" right above the swastika on charlie's forehead. just another reason to love him!!!

August 2, 2005

here is henry, stacy's son. he is holding the "henry doll", a replica of him as a 6 year old i believe. stacy made the damn thing for an OSU art project and i have adopted him. when i drove him home from columbus, buckled up in the passanger seat, i think i scared a few truck drivers. once when my mom was house-sitting, she put the doll in my bed and when i came home and saw it i almost collapased.

henry is an amazing kid. we all lived together in columbus when he was around 2 years old, and he was just magical. he became best friends with my dog miles and once refused to eat hot dogs (because he didn't want to eat miles.) he's grown up into an amazing little boy who captivated all the animals at my house when he came to visit.

he's good stuff!

August 1, 2005

die jaclyn smith!!!!

this cell phone pic makes me laugh for so many reasons.....

i went to kmart in a last ditch effort to get a damn "lady business suit" for the interview on wednesday. i walked in and saw some really great stuff in the jaclyn smith section, but not in the plus-sized section. apparently fat gals don't need nice suits and jackets. just lots of ugly crap! sigh..... i went to dillards and tried on a beautiful jacket and skirt, on sale from $300 to $100. unfortunatly, i am a bit short, and the outfit made me look like a little kid in her mom's clothes. no time to get anything tailored, so i went with black dress pants and a blue button down shirt. should be sufficent in covering all tattoos and tricking the fancy-pants at ernst & young into thinking i could be a possible drone.

btw-i am looking for leads into the case of the barking dog. someone thought it would be funny to take one of those alarms for people who don't have dogs (plays a recording of barking if someone rattles the door.) i got home from disaster shopping ordeal and was rushing around feeding the pets. then i heard a little yipping dog barking IN MY OWN KITCHEN! i ran in and found the dogs staring at the device. i picked it up and went to shut it out, but someone had removed the on/off switch!
i had to take out the batteries to make it stop. hahahaha!!!