OCD fun!!!!
ok! to all my neurotic and crazy friends, let's all list our strangest OCD habits. not everyone has diagnosed OCD, but everyone has the weird little things they do. i am slowly working on giving up some of these "rituals" using cognitive behavioral therapy on my own. and talking and laughing about the weird shit we all do helps. here's my list (i'll break it into catagories so it doesn't get too long):
- food cannot touch on the plate. i don't want corn juice running in my mashed potatoes. i have to eat one item and finish before moving on. never a bite of chicken, then bite of brocolli, then back to chicken. that's just madness! i can't eat or drink anything room tempurature either (except snack items like chips or cookies)
- string freaks me out. don't ask because i have no idea why! wet string will send me into a full panic.
- clothes have to go on in a certain order. bottoms always go on before tops. i mean COME ON!
- cleaning with old rags (even non-stringy ones) is disgusting. paper towels, people!!! that's right up there with old people blowing their nose into "hankies". blech!
- everything has its place. the hammer for ramen noodles goes in a certain drawer. and you don't nail pics with that hammer! it's small and perfect for busting up the noodles in the package before boiling.
- everything needs to be lined up straight. i am constantly adjusting the living room throw rug after the dogs go wild playing and make it crooked.
- anything related to teeth brushing, flossing or saliva needs to occur in the bathroom. do not floss your teeth in front of me!!! recently my bathroom sink was clogged and i had to brush my teeth in the kitchen sink. there was a dirty dish i forgot to wash the night before and i almost puked!
- my friend matt recently sent me into a full OCD fit (i start giggling and spinning in circles, sometimes make up little songs or singing in something that sounds like chinese). his toliet was gross, i bitched, so he offered to clean it. i saw him use the toliet brush with no cleaner on it and flipped out. i know i sang a song about it, but can't remember. it usually goes, "oh no no no!!! that's not happening, look away!!! look away!!!"
- i used to have a song i sang everyday when putting on deodorant, but after telling jennette, stacy and lisa ann about it (and laughing for days) i gave it up. now that's progress!!!
- at least i don't wash my hands obsessively. those people are freaks.....
ok! to all my neurotic and crazy friends, let's all list our strangest OCD habits. not everyone has diagnosed OCD, but everyone has the weird little things they do. i am slowly working on giving up some of these "rituals" using cognitive behavioral therapy on my own. and talking and laughing about the weird shit we all do helps. here's my list (i'll break it into catagories so it doesn't get too long):
9 comments:
"Deodorant, Deodorschmint, Deodorant!"
Man I love that song!
I don't have a lot, mine are kind of vague.
I can't shower in a dirty bathroom. Even if it's not mine I will be nosy and try to find cleaner under the sink to wipe it down with....
I cannot eat food from a dirty fridge. Ditto Ditto Repeat. How anyone can is a mystery. Even pizza from a box. How can anyone enjoy food that came from a nest of e.coli and mold?
I do wash my hands a hundred times a day. I change people's pants, you dig? If I touch something dirty and don't wash my hands right after, I'll lie in bed awake until I get up and wash them again.
Lastly I regularly clean all the nozzles of condiments, cleaners and hygiene items by running them under hot water. I can't stand for gunk on the mustard, toothpaste or dish detergent. If you eat mustard that has touched the crusty dry mustard going out, I don't know you.
ramen noodle hammer???? Now I know what to buy everyone for Xmas...oh my.....
I have a thing with numbers...I count steps I take and when I buy something I keep repeating that amt until a new number comes into my head...its very annoying....maybe thats why my daughter has anxiety with numbers and math....
Is your song choppin broccoli???
A noodlehammer? Charlton-WTF? That being said:
I will second the "no food touching on the plate - eat everything in order." I have done that since the dawn of time. I thought everyone did. Seems perfectly logical not to want gravy on your corn if you ask me.
I also have to segregate my M&M's (well, back when I could still EAT M&M's). Pour the entire package out and segregate them into colors - there are always WAY more brown than any other color. Then you must eat all of them by color, starting with the color highest in number, until you have an equal number of each color - then you eat them one at a time - in color spectrum order.
And speaking of color spectrum order. I am a sucker for bath products - body washes, you know? And I have quite a lot of them and I have to line them all up on the top of the shower in color spectrum order starting with pink/red to orange to yellow to green to blue to purple...always starting with the lightest of each color and going to the darkest. Every once in awhile, just to screw with me, one of my rotton family will shuffle them about and it about makes me about crack my nut.
I can't stand if my shoelaces are uneven, or even worse, if they are twisted in the holes. They must be completely smooth and straight and if the tongue in the shoe (especially a sneaker) is askew - God love it.
When I clean up dirty dishes, I must first "align" them before putting them in the dishwasher. All of the bowls in a stack with the other bowls. Dishes with the dishes. Silverware in a vessle such as a glass or a pot, points down. Glasses lined up by size. THEN you can put them in the dishwasher. I say it is giving me the opportunity to assess what I have and how I must arrange it in the machine. Joe says it takes me twice as long as if I would just sling them in there. For some reason, however, when I do it this way, I seem to be able to get twice as much stuff in the machine than old Joe the Toe can. So he can kiss it.
I cannot/will not use a dishtowel or face towel or bath towel more than once. EVER. My hamper is always full of once-used towels that need washed and Joe bitches his brains out. He will never convince me that it is proper to dry my face with a towel that might have previously been used to dry my ass - albeit a clean one. Kiss it again, Speedracer, and wash the towels.
And finally, when I run the vacuum, I must do it so the tracks from the sweeper make straight lines - like the grass at a ballpark. If I go crooked, I have to go back and re-do it. That is why Joe now runs the vacuum.
Sweet Loretta Martin - I'm a freakin' kook.
Magalotti Wins!
Do you and Charlton both gag at that KFC Mashed Potato Bowl commercial then?
Am I really the winner?! Or does this make me the biggest loser? I mean, Charlton IS afraid of string, afterall. Bloody hell.
And what is this KFC mashed potato bowl? God, I'm glad I missed it. If it is a bunch of swill all mixed together in one bowl, then I'm certain it would be totally out of bounds. Just like those wretched, hideous Breakfast Skillet things from Bob Heavens where they mix the eggs and potatoes and meat and gravy all in the same plate. Makes me want to snatch myself bald and run out the front door yelling in tongue. Almost as bad as when Joe smashes his sunny side up eggs with his toast like a big dumb orangutan and the yolk runs all over his plate. Jesus. I need to go lay down.
The KFC Bowl is their crappy instant mashed potatoes with layers of corn and popcorn chicken covered wuth gravy and yellow cheese.
It is really gross. Why anywone would want to eat that or advertise it is a mystery. It should be kept very very secret.
You are all a bunch of OCD freaks.
Everyone knows food should not touch. UNLESS it was meant to touch. Such as eggs and toast, although eating undercooked eggs is the same as eating eyeballs.
Ramen noodle hammer. What a weak crackhead. You are supposed to break them with your hands, if you have the muscle.
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