(this is the ad i remember from childhood, in the back of comic books. the one my mom would never let me order!)
yes, it was inevitable. the weird girl in the office brought in sea monkeys. what took me so long??? i've got everyone excited (or at least mildly amused) to see what happens when we hatch the eggs. how could you not be excited????
sadly, the first step (water purification) takes 24 hours and it's a friday. some folks suggested we go ahead and start the water purification now and let it go all weekend. and for the first time in my life, i said, "we have to follow the rules!!!" i mean, i might break the dress code and steal binder clips for potato chip bags, but i am not gonna mess up these sea monkeys!
according to the brochure, office pets reduce stress and prevent heart attacks. if today were a "wear denim to cure cancer" day, i would practically be a doctor! the brochure also lists some amazing products for sale, including:
port-a-pet pocket aquarium (take 'em out for a walk!)
electric ocean zoo showboat (light up the aquarium and project it onto a wall!)
sea medic sea monkey medicine (for when wearing jeans don't cure 'em!)
banana treats (monkeys love bananas, duh!)
cupid's arrow mating powder (bow chicka- bow! that's porn guitar music, fyi)
red magic sea monkey vitamins (contains "every know vitamin your sea monkeys needs" and also "adds a pretty red tone to their pale bodies". would this work for ghostly pale groundcat i wonder?)
professional sea monkey hobby center and executive sea monkeys for grownups (watch them fight over the corner office and use underwater blackberries!)
(this image is for SDS)
i am not making any of this up. go to the official website here. my god, there's an underwater diver, a leash, and a diploma i can order naming me a "secret sea monkey scientist". this is better then anything on my amazon wish list!!!!!
i am not making any of this up. go to the official website here. my god, there's an underwater diver, a leash, and a diploma i can order naming me a "secret sea monkey scientist". this is better then anything on my amazon wish list!!!!!
my work friend asked me if they would have the little crowns shown in the drawings. of course they will!!!! the brochure shows them in little crowns in front of a castle, as well as having a time machine. although i'm not sure why sea monkeys need a time machine.... but who are we to question the magic and mystery of sea monkeys???
schedule of events:
monday- day of water purification (i'm wearing a lab coat for this)
tuesday- hatching of the eggs
wednesday and ongoing- office fun for everyone!!!!!
sea monkey mania website is here, enjoy! and get ready to make a bowlfull of happiness in your home!!!!!! sea monkey worship (on sundays only?) here.
holy crap, there's a pink sea monkey friendship locket you can wear around your neck!!! ok, i have to stop. FOR NOW!
8 comments:
I believe the crowns come with the deluxe edition kit...but for $19.99 plus shipping you can order crowns for everyone...
whatever mom! you refused me those sea monkeys during my childhood. it's probably why i turned out so bad!!!!
my god...you've corrupted those poor coworkers of yours
if by "corrupted" you mean "inspired", then yes. i've taught these people how to dream, dammit!!! how to get out of these dingy cubicles, and experience the magic of life!!!!!!!
and i've cut down their chances of heart attacks, and next friday is "wear your cute new jeans to cure cancer" day.
i am waiting for the nomination for a nobel peace prize....
Um...Aren't you nearly 40yrs old? Sea Monkeys? Really.
dear anonymous,
you're never too old for sea monkeys!
duh.
dear anonymous,
fuck off.
really.
fuck off fuckface, and (as zak would say) "die in a fire."
you, my friend, are what hunter s. thompson talked about when he asked, "when did the fun die?" you are one of the fun-killers of the world. your very existence is one of the reasons he shot himself in the head.
sea mokeys, dolls in wells, glitter pens, crayons (the big box of 100), these are a few of my favorite thing....
having fun, being stupid and silly, laughing, real from the gut laughter, is where it's at, even at "almost 40".
i prefer to think of myelf as being some combination of a 12 year old giddy girl with glittery pink shoelaces, and a 90 year old man, wheezing and shaking his fist at those damn kids to get off his lawn.
so there!
"yes, it was inevitable. the weird girl in the office brought in sea monkeys."
LOL, this is me too!! I took a kit in and everybody thought I was sad/mad/dangerous but they spent more time coming over to my desk to stare at them than I spent raising them! I love growing things like this - got some Triops started a few days ago. I'd love an ant farm but I'm too afraid they'll escape.
Post a Comment