some actual musings and thoughts on stuff....
i know my blog has turned into a photo journal more then anything. i mean, how many pics of dogs and boyfriends and my kitchen appliances can i post? (well, i could post a ton, and i will!) but today i wanted to actually blog about something. like, a real topic. today, i want to talk about xmas, the holidays, and all the expectations that come along with this time of the year.
first off, there are the "childhood memories". everyone i know, including me, has a mix of happy memories and some family drama mixed in. i think we all teeter between glorifying the past, remembering near perfect and magical xmas mornings, or go to the other extreme of remembering the stress and fights. to me, if you can find a balance, it allows you to decide what kind of holidays you have in the present.
if you look back at childhood memories of xmas a little too fondly, nothing will ever measure up as an adult.
if you think of christmas as only a time of arguments and resentment and disappointment, you miss the chance to make it better now.
here's my bossy advice on how to enjoy your holidays:
birthdayzilla
p.s. my photoblog will be updated with holiday pics by EOD today. go check it out!
first off, there are the "childhood memories". everyone i know, including me, has a mix of happy memories and some family drama mixed in. i think we all teeter between glorifying the past, remembering near perfect and magical xmas mornings, or go to the other extreme of remembering the stress and fights. to me, if you can find a balance, it allows you to decide what kind of holidays you have in the present.
if you look back at childhood memories of xmas a little too fondly, nothing will ever measure up as an adult.
if you think of christmas as only a time of arguments and resentment and disappointment, you miss the chance to make it better now.
here's my bossy advice on how to enjoy your holidays:
- remember that you are a grown-up and you have more control over how you spend your holidays then you did as a child
- learn from mistakes made by your parents, friends, and yourself
- be open to new holiday traditions
- find the joy in the simple aspects of the holidays
- do not turn into a "bridezilla" and demand or expect everything to turn out perfectly
- remember that there are only about 10 shopping days until my birthday, and i expect it to be PERFECT!!!
birthdayzilla
p.s. my photoblog will be updated with holiday pics by EOD today. go check it out!
Comments
i think you've need to grieve these last 2 holiday seasons. and now you're seeing that it's time to move forward.
there are ways to remember the family/friends/pets we're missing too.
just to be able to laugh about how our step dad hung up a ton of lights on that last xmas he was with us, that was good. we even laughed about how (after he passed away just a few days after xmas) we were left to try and take down the 8 million strings of lights he put up.
jennette, my mom and i went outside and tried unwrapped the lights from the trees, but he had used so many and they were so intricately wrapped! (and god knows he had a method to take them all down in an orderly fashion, but we weren't privy to this method.)
we ended up with scissors, just cutting them down and throwing them away. some of the neighbors came out to help us too. we were all shaking our heads and laughing (and crying a little) about what a lunatic my step dad had been about those lights.
ah, yes, now i am laughing (and crying a little at my desk), but mostly laughing.
:)
In the immortal words of AC/DC frontman Brian Johnson (1980-present)
"...don't worry about tomorrow
Take it today
Forget about the tip
We'll get hell to pay
Have a drink on me"
here's what i wonder: is there a way to bring some of that magical holiday feeling back?
obviously, i do think it's possible. i think if you can be open to the possibilities, without huge expectations, you can feel the "magic" again, in a new way.
i mean, my grandma died right after thanksgiving and then my step dad right after xmas, all in the same year! talk about getting "burned"!!! for a few years the holidays were rough, then we slowly started enjoying things again...
i know the world is a shitty place a lot of the time. i know people generally suck. they hurt you, they let you down, they make bad choices...
but i feel like i have to look for the "magic", the little moments of joy, things that make it worthwhile to continue living.
dan has this movie he loves, called "stay". i couldn't begin to explain the movie...but there's a character who once tried to commit suicide. when she hears about a young man about to do the same, she says, "tell him not to do it. tell him there's too much beauty.."
that gets me every time....