April 18, 2007



over the last few weeks at work, i've been asked to join some high level business meetings. by "high level" i mean a bunch of big-wigs, VPs and assorted business folks. i've been keeping track of some particularly annoying catch phrases. here's a list, starting with the most popular one:
  • let's think outside the box

  • it's not a hard & fast rule

  • let's circle back to that topic later

  • let's take that topic offline

  • we're not married to this concept

  • it's a more granular concept

  • i'll ping you
i don't even fully know what some of those phrases actually mean! the trick is to wear a nice outfit and look interested, nod your head and ask a good question once in a while.

6 comments:

  1. Anonymous3:07 PM

    a recent buzzword around my office that's finally started to die off was "belly-button" for something that was a central node or point or person to contact.
    oh, and then there was "eyechart" for a powerpoint slide that was a clusterfuck of words and images.

    i think since vps and upper eschelon of management spend so much money on their outfits they don't really know what to do with their time so they amuse themselves by trying to think up new catch phrases and see who's catches on first. that's where the real bragging rights lie.

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  2. GLITTERGIRL6:59 PM

    we need to start making up our own phrases, and say them all the time, like they make total sense.

    "now let's not hit the ball out of the park on this one"

    "we should be thinking outside the office, maybe meet at a fondue place..."

    "sorry bob, but your presentation is not up to building code 401.233"

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  3. Primordial Dork8:19 PM

    OMG, hahahhahahaha!

    It used to be my job to weed these types of phrases out of marketing schpiels for the CEO of our old company. A VERY hardworking guy, but inexplicably fond of the phrase "Harnessing the Synergy".

    I used to fight with him about it, it sounded so Soylent Green/Ice Nine. He meant, "Productive Collaboration." Or better yet, get some shit done, but had to say Harness and Synergy. Insane. My sister still works for him, and she also does not hesitate to tell him when he's full of crap.....

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  4. GLITTERGIRL11:18 AM

    "harness the melancholy" has a much nicer ring to it. or maybe "productive ennui"...

    (yeah, i've been on another edward gorey kick. maybe i could write a "how to exceed in business using the techniques of edward gorey" manual)

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  5. glittermom9:41 PM

    I can't think of anything to say but I like your box of people and smiley face people...

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  6. Groundcat12:00 PM

    here's some i found online that we should adopt...

    How about never? Is never good for you?

    I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.

    You sound reasonable... Time to up my medication.

    I don't work here. I'm a consultant. (oh wait, i guess you could actually use that one)

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