November 30, 2005

baby reynolds....
photo credit: the mysterious nova k.
lisa ann's little bro andy is in an amazing band. check them out at : they are playing the beachland ballroom in a few days, if you're in cleveland you should check them out! you can also download a few of their songs on the myspace site. (for those of you who don't know, lisa is is one of my best columbus friends, although she's too stuck up to email. she's in grad school. whatever miss brainiac!)
you should know what your country is doing.....

also, check out stacy's blog for a nice debate on harry potter. apparently god don't like him!

November 29, 2005

holy shit! they stole my idea!!!!
me: someone brought up barbie dolls at work
me: i blurted out about how as a kid i built my barbie a wheelchair
me: then ended up mummifiying her
me: i need to stop telling people that shit! at least at work!
trollboy: lol
me: thank god i didn't tell them about the cher barbie my mom got me
me: she was like an inch taller then ken and really scary
me: she ended up stealing the RV and raping ken
trollboy: what a bitch
me: ken was the bitch!
me: total queen....
me: i am cutting and pasting this
me: should i change your IM name to matt?
trollboy: blog?
me: yup
trollboy: or trollboy
trollboy: just let me get an ad in real quick
trollboy: cuz
me: ok
trollboy: there's nothing quite as nice as GoldBond Medicated Powder.
trollboy: there I'm done
me: hahaha
me: i use that shit all the time!!!!
me: because i am an old lady

quick post. still at work. i can get emails though! and i am loving all the blog activity. we have "cross posting"! i made that up when i saw sladj posted on stacy's blog.

QA lockdown has been a blast! besides evil bossman's crab-ass mood this morning, we are having fun. and i'm doing really well at the job itself. it feels great to be doing a good job, and knowing my boss appreciates it. the last year or so i didn't have that. in fact, my old manager (BM) is still dead to me!!!

ok, let me find a good random pic online and then call it a night.....

oh wait, i'll post one of the pics from thanksgiving at the boss' house. one of the guys from india took this pic. hehehehe.......

November 28, 2005

ahhahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!! the best santa pic ever! ana is the best baby EVER!

i'm still at work (7pm). i managed to pick a seat right in front of crazy-bossman, so we've been fighting all day. which makes it fun at least....

November 27, 2005

random stuff....

this might be the last post for a while. i feel like i am preparing for boot camp today! i've got a full tank of gas, laundry done, house is clean. i am loading up the ipod (i work better with music) and filling my backpack up with all sorts of provisions for "QA lockdown".

i am loving the blogging and all the comments everyone posts. working this crazy schedule, it has become one of my last ways to be creative and have fun. i've got links to everyone's blogs and websites here. i highly recommend stacy's blog. the bi-a-tch writes better then me (which pisses me off!) we've been friends since we met as roomates at OSU in 1988. she was a little skate punk and i was alternative girl. our 3rd roomate was a tri-delt sorority girl who liked to come back to the dorm drunk and pee on the floor. delta delta delta, can i help ya help ya help ya?!?!?!!?

in other blog news chris is in LUV, zak is in luv and working on ending family drama, and carlo is obsessed with cell phones! craig's blog might be my favorite out of them all....

in other news, i ran into bob golic (former cleveland browns guy who lived on our street.) he remembered jogging with my dad back in the old days. i have a great pic of my dad i want to post, but the scan sucks so it will have to wait.

otherwise, i have to say this: mr. clean magic eraser sponge kicks ass! (thanks for the tip stacy.) also, the BK ads scare me. please excuse the crappy pic, but it's the best i could find.

peace, out!

November 25, 2005

OCD fun!!!!
ok! to all my neurotic and crazy friends, let's all list our strangest OCD habits. not everyone has diagnosed OCD, but everyone has the weird little things they do. i am slowly working on giving up some of these "rituals" using cognitive behavioral therapy on my own. and talking and laughing about the weird shit we all do helps. here's my list (i'll break it into catagories so it doesn't get too long):
  • food cannot touch on the plate. i don't want corn juice running in my mashed potatoes. i have to eat one item and finish before moving on. never a bite of chicken, then bite of brocolli, then back to chicken. that's just madness! i can't eat or drink anything room tempurature either (except snack items like chips or cookies)
  • string freaks me out. don't ask because i have no idea why! wet string will send me into a full panic.
  • clothes have to go on in a certain order. bottoms always go on before tops. i mean COME ON!
  • cleaning with old rags (even non-stringy ones) is disgusting. paper towels, people!!! that's right up there with old people blowing their nose into "hankies". blech!
  • everything has its place. the hammer for ramen noodles goes in a certain drawer. and you don't nail pics with that hammer! it's small and perfect for busting up the noodles in the package before boiling.
  • everything needs to be lined up straight. i am constantly adjusting the living room throw rug after the dogs go wild playing and make it crooked.
  • anything related to teeth brushing, flossing or saliva needs to occur in the bathroom. do not floss your teeth in front of me!!! recently my bathroom sink was clogged and i had to brush my teeth in the kitchen sink. there was a dirty dish i forgot to wash the night before and i almost puked!
  • my friend matt recently sent me into a full OCD fit (i start giggling and spinning in circles, sometimes make up little songs or singing in something that sounds like chinese). his toliet was gross, i bitched, so he offered to clean it. i saw him use the toliet brush with no cleaner on it and flipped out. i know i sang a song about it, but can't remember. it usually goes, "oh no no no!!! that's not happening, look away!!! look away!!!"
  • i used to have a song i sang everyday when putting on deodorant, but after telling jennette, stacy and lisa ann about it (and laughing for days) i gave it up. now that's progress!!!
  • at least i don't wash my hands obsessively. those people are freaks.....

it's been nice knowing ya.....

next week is being called "QA lockdown". my boss tends to talk about this job using prison or army metaphors. the other day when he said, "all hands on deck" i asked him if he was a pirate.

so next week, mon-fri, we are being locked up in a large conference room, away from any "distractions" like phones and email. core hours are 8:30am to 6:30pm, but we were told to not make evening plans because it will probably be later evenings. so next week might end up being 12 hours days.

well, i can't bitch because i knew the hours would be like this when i took the job. and i am being paid for the OT. so i shall keep in mind hunter s. thompson's favorite saying: buy the ticket, take the ride.....

November 22, 2005

ignostic is a word...

a friend and i were talking about the whole god thing. saying i am an atheist just doesn't feel right. so i did some research and i think this describes my beliefs:

"Ignosticism is the view that the question of whether or not deities exist is inherently meaningless. It is a popular view among many logical positivists such as Rudolph Carnap and A. J. Ayer, who hold that talk of gods is literally nonsense. According to ignostics, "Does a god exist?" has the same logical status as "What color is Saturday?"; they are both nonsensical, and thus have no meaningful answers."

hey, i'm ignostic!

i am respect of others religous and spiritual beliefs. i just don't like "bossy religon". like people knocking on my door to save my soul. or god references on money or the pledge of allegience. even as a kid i wouldn't say the "under god" part! when i had surgery at st. vincent's, a priest came over and offered to pray with me. i said, "no thanks!" and giggled, and the poor guy looked so confused!

ok, now for a new survey: what are your religous/ spiritual beliefs or non-beliefs? you can post anonymus if you feel it's too private. i know for me, it's been a little scary at times telling people i am an atheist/agnostic (now an ignostic!) people are pretty judgemental about that kind of thing in the country. the media always portrays atheists as goofy or somehow dangerous.... well, i am out of the god closet!
thanks alot chris!

listening to chris talk about the new girlfriend and how wonderful it's going got me thinking i should try online dating again. i started to write up a personal ad. i am not big on appearances, so i don't really care what the guy looks like. i mean, i'm not going to date brian peppers, but looks are at the bottom of my list of requirements.

that being said, most people place a great value on the physical. so i start trying to honestly describe myself. short, chubby, thin hair, tattoos, scars, and lately my limp is back!

now i am comfortable with my appearance. i know if i get the right outfit and wear make up i do ok. this is not an "i'm so fat and ugly!" post. this is a "i am realistic" post. i'm not the girl who gets compliments like, "my you have beautiful eyes!" i get, "wow, you have a beautiful moonpie face! like a fucked up chinese drawing." that's an actual real quote!

so what am i saying? just that it's not going to be easy to find the right guy who will dig my scene. i mean, besides appearance we have the whole "weird girl" issue. stealing signs off the bus, putting my dog in a dress (on tv), etc...

hey, maybe i'll just cut and paste this whole post and make it my ad!

chris, if this ends up a disaster, you are so dead to me!

November 21, 2005

when the fat suit becomes black face.....

now i thought the premise of shallow hal was pretty funny. the clips i've seen are great. and monica from "friends" in the fat suit (high school flashbacks) was funny too. it takes a lot to personally offend me.

what i do find insulting is the current trend of taking a skinny actress/model, putting them in giant fat suits. they think they are doing some kind of public service, going out in the world to see that people are mean to the fatties. the worst part is when they see themselves for the first time in the fat suit and all the work done to give them fake triple chins, and they cry.

to quote stacy, "i've never cried over being fat!"

right after the jackass on ET did her "groundbreaking" fatty story, they had a story about twin sisters dying from anorexia. each weighs about 30 pounds.

irony anyone???

November 20, 2005

the other night, griffin walked by with my stuffed bee in his mouth. for some reason he decided, after living here over a year, that he likes the bee. i gave him a treat the other night and he layed it on top of the bee! not sure if he's trying to feed it....but he loves his bee!

this is dixie flipping out hardcore like a ninja.
this is what my boss calls "the gam-x lifestyle". you become so exhausted you can't even make a pot of coffee! yeah, i forgot to put the pot on.

i have some funny pics of the dogs and cats that i will put on the photo blog later. go check 'em out!

November 19, 2005

this is my all-time favorite pic of chris and zak. everytime i see it i laugh. the body language says it all! zak on the left, probably yelling "WTF???" at chris for missing the ball. and chris' look of total defeat. i love these guys!!!! even if they are mean and sneaky and recently "PWNED" me (as the kids say.)

"The verb pwn (past tense: pwned, pwnd, pwn'd, pwnt) as used by the Internet gaming subculture, means to beat or dominate an opponent (pwned can mean "to be made a fool of"). While it probably originated as a typographical error of the word own, it is now used intentionally by many members of the subculture. The term has become so ubiquitous in Internet circles that it is often used outside of gaming contexts – for example, "He just got pwned in that debate", "The bears pwned that hunter", "Arsenal opened a can of ultimate pwnage", "we tricked jen into taking down the blog about zak wanting michael buble to sign his taint. she got pwned!!!"
rachel sent me this pic, but i think maybe one of the fisher boys is behind this....

November 18, 2005

i brought a pomogranete in and none of the americans knew what it was. fernando thought it was a big onion when he saw it in the fridge! keep in mind he also once tried to eat a buckeye still in its green outer shell (he thought it was fruit.)

it's been less then a week and my boss is back to barking orders and saying things like, "If you're looking for sympathy, go to Webster's dictionary and look between shit & syphillus!" this was in response to my letting him know that my fingers are developing callouses from typing so much!

oh, and to the bossy undercover freak: you come up with something better and i'll post it!
so what do i do on my lunch break? i sort my chex mix (OCD) and google brian peppers. yeah, that's how i roll.......

November 17, 2005

this was on the news today:

"Woman who abandoned cats must spend night in Metroparks alone"

The woman convicted of abandoning cats in the Metroparks was sentenced Thursday afternoon. She was sentenced to 90 days in jail, but appears as though she will only serve about 15 days.The first night however, she will have to spend in the Metroparks by herself from dusk to dawn.

it's snowing today and being in this building is like being in a snow globe. i love snow! that being said, i am not a big fan of xmas. i don't like the whole "birthday of baby jesus" part. it's just an ancient pagen holiday (winter solstice) that the christians took over. also, santa is a little creepy....

November 15, 2005

we might be getting snow and ice tomorrow. i'm so excited! i took this pic last winter at my mom's house.

ok, i have an "official announcement": my job just got crazy. from now until xmas i will be really busy at work, for all 10 hours and probably more. so please don't be offended if i don't IM or email! i'll try and keep up with the blog on my lunch breaks. y'all can keep emailing me and IMing, i just might not respond. but don't stop or i'll be bored.

November 14, 2005

am i the only one who thinks the new mayor of cleveland (frank jackson) looks an awful lot like my dog griffin?

when i get the scanner working, i'll show you an old pic of my cat morris who bore a striking resemblence to martin luther king jr.

meet clarice, now known as (possibly) clarence. give us some good ideas for a boy cat name!

November 13, 2005

hi! i realized i put everyone's pic on here but my own. so here i am, driving through shoregate parking lot about an hour ago. it's not a very flattering pic, but i like it. i look goofy. it is goofy to take a pic of myself in some parking lot, just so i can come home and put it online. goofy makes like fun.

November 12, 2005

bad news at boss got called into HR for harassing (picking on) me. some out of town jackass complained about him. i need to hunt her down and introduce my fist to her face. of course we'll find other ways to torture each other. i am about to put a pic of oprah on his laptop. he hates oprah more then anything. and now he won't be able to yell at me about it, so this might be fun.....

November 11, 2005

dear stacy,
i win!!!! i found something worse then brian peppers!

the great sangwich debate rages on........

conversation on the sangwich- burger debate.....

me: dude, when someone asks you what your favorite "sangwich" is, would you ever even think to answer with a cheeseburger?

david: I don't think that a hamburger or cheeseburger is a sangwich. Ham 'n Cheese, maybe BLT, but not a cheeseburger, please burger!

later that day......
glitterdog1970: my sis just emailed me this, "ps-the winking lizard boman's bacon cheeseburger is the best sanGwich ever!"

chrisohio0122: HAHA!!!!!!!! I R THE WINNER!!!

glitterdog1970: it ain't no GD sangwich!!!

chrisohio0122: shut the fuck up! a sangwich is anything between two pieces of bread!
"The sandwich is a food item typically consisting of two slices of bread between which are laid one or more layers of meat, cheese, or other filling, together with optional condiments, sauces, and other accompaniments. The bread is often lightly buttered or covered in a flavored oil when it is baked, or added in the sandwich to enhance flavor."

glitterdog1970: bah!!!

chrisohio0122: so step off!!

chrisohio0122: talk to the hand!!!

chrisohio0122: don't let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya!!

chrisohio0122: make like a tree and leaf!!

glitterdog1970: fine, then from now on you have to say, "i think i will have a hambuger sangwich for lunch."

chrisohio0122: do people say they want a reuben sangwich? NO! they just say they want a reuben. Is it not a sangwich? How about a BLT? do people order a BLT sangwich? NO! It's implied that it's a sangwich

glitterdog1970: dammit, that's true!

chrisohio0122: MWAHAHAHAH

glitterdog1970: "implied sangwich theory"

glitterdog1970: you win

glitterdog1970: this time....

chrisohio0122: go ahead. shake your fist at my im window, you know you want to.

November 9, 2005

diagram of the new face transplant surgery about to be performed in cleveland. it scared me a bit. KOMPRESSOR DOES NOT FACE TRANSPLANT!

November 8, 2005



November 5, 2005

"a very special episode" on the blog.....
The sandwich is a food item typically consisting of two slices of "Bread" between which are laid one or more layers of "Meat", "Vegetable", "Cheese", or other fillings, together with optional or traditionally provided "Condiment", "Sauce, and other accompaniments. The bread is often either lightly "Buttered", covered in a flavoured "Oil" when baked, or oil is added into the sandwich to enhance flavour.

ok folks, i am bossing EVERYONE who reads this blog (all 15 of you!) to click on the comment link and tell me your all time favorite sandwich (pronounced sang-a-wich of course.) then i will vote on the entries and pronounce a winner.

the definition above will serve as the basis on rules. good luck!!!!

i will tell you my 2 favorites, which are of course disqualified from the contest.

#2 fav: turkey, baby swiss, mayo, iceburg lettuce on lightly toasted wheat. do not substitute miracle whip for mayo. get fancy deli honey roasted turkey and baby swiss. and use tons of iceberg lettuce. my friend rachel actually invented this beauty, but she's vegetarian and i added the turkey. thus, i have named this sandwich "the meaty rachel".

#1 fav: this was invented by me when i was about 5, during the great "ketchup vs. mustard" war between me and my best friend sherry perry. she loved ketchup and i, mustard. we fought constantly and then begun coming up with experimental ways to incorporate the condiments into food. she put ketchup in her soup! then i came up with the best sandwich EVER!. soft white bread, untoasted of course. bologna, lots of mustard, and crushed snyder's potato chips. this my friends, i called the "flippin' out hardcore" sandwich.

now i boss everyone (including busy dr. and mommy sladj) to respond.

November 3, 2005

update on the, "you're not allowed to hit anyone, ever!" blog entry from 10/8/05

update from one of 2 friends who was assaulted by their spouse over the summer:

"Went to court today, that's all over. Uh, yeah 90 days in jail and two years probation. This is for NOT hitting hard enough to bruise. And that was a plea bargain I agreed to. He goes to counselling, the 90 days is suspended. He so much as looks at me funny, he serves the time. When you are trapped with someone like that and they have you "gaslit", they think that nothing will happen to them. But I was amazed to learn, gee, the judicial system takes it kind of seriously when men whack mothers in front of their kids."

good news!!!!! i really hope the counselling helps her soon-to-be ex. he's not a bad or evil person and a very loving father to the baby. goes........

judge judy is a great show. and i wish i was as super cool and genius as zak.


November 2, 2005

brian peppers is a swedish porn star!!!!
(view at your own risk. i am being kind by not posting the actual image.)

work's a little stressful......

still love the job, just not the hours. 2 months of 60 hours per week is a bad scene. we had a huge meeting today. some VP from the UK flew in to tell us "great job so far!" then went on to suggest 15 hour days to get the project complete. possibly even sunday hours! i have thanksgiving and christmas days off, otherwise there's no telling.

so from now until mid-december (project is due on dec. 12th), please don't be offended if you don't see or hear from me much. unless it's someone i don't like, then please be offended.

another "hero" of mine, tom waits. an amazing musican and actor, and funny as hell.

My kids are starting to notice I'm a little different from the other dads. "Why don't you have a straight job like everyone else?" they asked me the other day. I told them this story: In the forest, there was a crooked tree and a straight tree. Every day, the straight tree would say to the crooked tree, "Look at me...I'm tall, and I'm straight, and I'm handsome. Look at're all crooked and bent over. No one wants to look at you." And they grew up in that forest together. And then one day the loggers came, and they saw the crooked tree and the straight tree, and they said, "Just cut the straight trees and leave the rest." So the loggers turned all the straight trees into lumber and toothpicks and paper. And the crooked tree is still there, growing stronger and stranger every day.